Gumbo

 

Gumbo: Unrelated conglomerate of stories

Whew this has been a weird week (more so than normal).  Regular readers of my blog know that the White House always have something going on however this past week has been a whirlwind of activities, drama, fun and lots and lots of work.  You ready? Lets do it ..

 

 

Teenage Lingo of the week:

T.H.O.T: (That Hoe Over There) – An individual with a number of concurrent sex partners that is well above the norm; basically whore.  Plural: Thotties: a bunch of hoes

Lil Man: Yo that chick over there is fine.
Junebug:  Naw bruh, leave that alone she a straight up thot.
Lil Man: Oh word????           

Thirsty:  A harrassive (spell check doesn’t recognize this word but you know what I mean) person; doing the most to get someone’s attention; desperate. ( back in the day this was called  SWEATING)

Introductions to new Cast member:

Trixsy: Super power is ‘Word Smith’.  Jack of all trades, master of all.

Crab

Okay so this was brought to our attention Tuesday however it happened Monday of last week at our home. IT REALLY did, I couldn’t make up half the foolishness that goes on in my life if I tried. In my Kevin Harts voice LET ME EXPLAIN ....

Down to one vehicle, so I totally forgot about this story but its relevant. Do you want the long or short version to the one car story?  In the essence of time, I will stick to the short version. Papa Smurfs drive shaft fell from under the truck and the rear differential locked up – no idea what any of this means other than I had to give up my car until his was ready, which was 3 days later. L  Papa Smurf and I were discombobulated to say the least. 

Tuesday went to the high school to pick up ‘The Entitled’, and as usual they were not ready.  We waited, cursed, fussed and continued to wait. Once we found two out of the three since we were in a decent mood Papa and I decided try out Bahama Bucks which is the latest snow cone craze in Atascocita. Lip popping with a brain freeze, these are by far the best snow cones I have had since moving to Texas. Attraction, the long lines, Drawback, the long lines. At first glance it looks like mass confusion but it works. You order at one end, pay and pick up at the other end. While we were marinating in our snow cones, which by the way were absolutely delish. Preacher and Russia decided to tell us what happened on Monday.

Russia was home before the boys. Preacher and Uno were on the way home, they caught a ride with a friend.  A car pulled up on them, honking and flashing lights. The friend sped up to get away from the unknown vehicle. Being the stupid kids that they are, they led the lunatic straight to our neighborhood.

Uno on the phone with Russia telling her what was happening to make sure she didn’t come out of the house.  He was not able to convince her to stay in the house so he yelled to stop the car. The car stops. He jumped out yelling “I have to save RUSSIA!!” He runs full speed between the homes, hair blowing in the wind, jumps the gate, run alongs the bayou until he gets behind our home.

In the meantime, the friend pulls up into our drive way, jumps out the car. A lady stops in front of my drive way, blocking the car in. The friend yells “Stop following me, my mom doesn’t like.” The lady “I am not following you, I am coming to this house” she yelled back. Preacher now out of the car not saying anything. The lady starts to interrogate them asking them where they were Saturday. According to her daughter and several other kids, Preacher and six other kids were named in egging and paint balling her home.  She takes picture of license plate.

Uno, jumps the gate to our back yard, burst thru the back door breathing hard, just as Russia was opening the front door.  “Stop Russia, I am serious” Uno said” Russia said ”Whatever, I am going curse this woman out for messing with my brother. She at our house." Before Uno could stop her, she opens the door, comes face to face with the lady who is confronting Preacher. The lady says, is your mom home. Russia responds “No ma’am”. 

Long story short. The lady proceeds to question Preacher about her home being egged and spray painted the previous weekend. All the kids deny being involved, then the lady proceeds to yell at Russia stating that her daughter is a good girl and they should stop picking on her. Preacher asked her how she knows where we live, she admits the school principal gave out our address as well as all the other kids involved.  She informs them that her neighbor videoed the incident and that she will press charges. The lady leaves her number with Russia for a parent to call to discuss further. Russia feels intimidated, so she calls the police. While waiting on the police the now determined crazy lady ask our neighbor’s about our family and what type of people we were. By the time the police comes, the lady is gone the kids tell their story he chases down the woman then encourages her to press charges if she has proof of the damages.

I am fuming, pissed off at this crazy bish for talking to my kids without me being present. I call to confront and straighten her ass out. We shared a few unkind words and ended with when she has proof let me know. We never heard from her or anything regarding the incident to date.

Note: The kids have joined forces to keep this from us ,now things have gotten REAL!

As parent, if another parent came to your home questioned/intimated your children, what you do?

Sausage:
There comes a time in a teenagers life where heartbreak is inevitable. You are either breaking hearts or your heart is being broken.  My one true heart break was in middle school/high school when DB broke up with me for a cheer leader.  I was devastated but my world didn’t end. Ah um, back to the story at hand. Russia has been dating a young man for the past 9 months. They have had their ups and downs however this time the down is staying down. As with any young girl, when it comes to a guy they have the attention span of flea. This doesn’t mean they are physically with every boy they like it just means once they get tired of the same old talk, everything about that boy becomes annoying.  The way the chew, all of a sudden you notice their eyes are not even on their face, or the fact that he is a nail biter or booger eater. Whatever the case good things come to an end. Russia contemplated, even cried over the fact that she had no feelings for her boo.  The relationship became boring and complacent.  It wasn’t the fact that she could not ‘technically’ date but when they were allowed to hang out it was boring (her words).  They would sit on the phone for hours , breathing not talking. Watching one another do homework on face time. Boring!!  Russia was over it, and ready to move on to bigger and better.

Typically we all went to Preachers basketball practices except for Uno (no surprise there).  I guess at some point one of the boys made his intentions known to Russia. That pretty black skin and deep New Orleans accent got her hook line and sinker.  At this point she was pondering her next move:

Boo #1:

1.       I do not want  to hurt to hurt him

2.       My boo is more of friend than boyfriend

3.       Boo is boring

4.       Boo is so in love and I am not

5.       His lips wet and chapped, how is that possible? Ewww

6.       He smart and I know he going to make money, GPA 6.0 ++

7.       Plus he has a chance to go to the NBA

8.       Mom buying him a car

9.       Doesn’t have to work

10.   Virgin

Potential Boo #2:

1.       Black Asian looking

2.       Deep thick New Orleans accent .. babee

3.       17 in 10th grade

4.       Honor roll student

5.       Works at Footlocker

6.       Borrows mom car

7.       Body full of tattoos

8.       Blond hair

9.       Good at basketball, not sure of NBA

10.   Semi Virgin

Russia dumped the good boy boo and is now talking to the bad boy boo that goes to school across the tracks.  The old boo cried. He begged. He followed her around school.  He even tried to solicit help from Uno.  Poor thing didn’t realize he was no longer a boo and now is considered a stalker.

Papa Smurf is not happy. Uh oh ..

My only concern is, if this relationship does go right it could go very wrong.  I am not judging but just being in that families presence they seem very, how should I say ghetto rough around the edges. We ain’t trying to get to beat up over a break up.

Who would you choose Boo #1 or Boo #2? Why do girls like bad boys?

Crawfish:

The season of the crawfish is here. These mud bugs are the hottest thing smoking during the months of April – June.  Crawfish on every corner, in seafood restaurants and in folks back yards they are essentially everywhere.  Last week Kroger grocery store set up a tent outside their business to sell them cooked or raw. My girls and I typically have a crawfish happy hour a few times during the season. So far we have only met up once which is fine with me because these critters are expensive by the lb!

 

We met up at Crabby Daddy (payroll week) to settle in for spicy crawfish, corn, sausage and potatoes.  Of course there were some folks that do not appreciate the hard work it takes to get the meat of the crawfish.  Kinda like how many licks does it take to get to the middle of a tootsie pop.  Hard work pays off and in this case it is a lot of work.  I personally only eat the tail however Trixsy sucks the head, and the claws. That claw meat is to soft, and I am not sucking no head. Hell I can barely stand to look at them while they look at me as I eat their tail.  It is all a process, so please do not take it lightly because folks will take this crawfish thing serious.  So much so, they have a CRAWFISH FESITVAL in Spring, Houston, Baytown and New Orleans. Strawberry Festival is next week.

Of course we went to the Crawfish festival to represent. We ate, danced and mingled. Good times with family.

Mix all these ingredients together with a dash of cayenne pepper, and seafood seasoning, there ya have it THE WHITE HOUSE Remix.

 

PICTURE OF THE WEEK:

 The foolishness has to be shared by someone, why not me?

 Until I write again. Holla!