Black Women, White Men..whats the big deal?

LOVING ET UX. v. VIRGINIA 

In 1967, the U.S. Supreme Court delivered a ruling that changed the law regarding interracial marriage in the United States. In Loving vs. Virginia, Mildred Jeter, a black woman, and Richard Loving, a white man, left Virginia to marry in Washington D.C., where interracial marriage was legal. The couple knew their union was illegal under Virginia's Racial Integrity Act of 1924.

After their ceremony, the Lovings returned to their home in Virginia. One night, while sleeping in the their beds, the Virginia police stormed the couple's bedroom. If the couple had've been engaging in intercourse and not sleeping, they would've been charged with a bigger crime than miscegenation violation. The Lovings were charged with a felony and served one out of a possible five years in prison. They were asked to leave the state after their release. They returned to D.C, and filed a lawsuit against the state of Virginia.
Along with the American Civil Liberties Union, the Lovings' case argued that Virginia's law violated the 14th Amendment of the Constitution. The battle eventually produced a class action lawsuit in the U.S District Court for the Eastern District of Virginia.
Finally, in June 1967, the court ruled that Virginia's anti-miscegenation statute violated the Due Process Clause and the Equal Protection Clause of the 14th Amendment.
The story of the Lovings was adopted in the 1996 film called "Mr. & Mrs. Loving," starring Lela Rochon, Timothy Hutton and Ruby Dee. (http://www.blackamericaweb.com/?q=content/little-known-black-history-fact-loving-vs-virginia

Can you believe interracial dating/marriages were illegal in the US? I have no idea why I am surprised, white folks had to much time on their hands back then.  From what I heard this morning on the radio, once the Lovings returned to Virigina, SWAT was waiting outside their home to try and catch them during an intimate moment.  Once the Lovings were settled in bed the police kicked in the doors and arrested the couple.

Things sho have changed Harpo...Now, the attitudes toward interracial dating have changed dramatically…thank goodness.  In my opinion today’s generation is more open minded than previous generations yet there are some biased individuals that have strong beliefs in the sanctity of preserving their own race. Let’s have an open mind and heart towards things we may not understand.

Disclaimer#1: This posting is not a judgment on anyone. I feel we are all equal in race, color and creed.  Life is to short ….love is love is love and has no boundaries.  Besides I like having options, don’t you?

In this day and age we are seeing more and more interracial couples immerging into the dating scene. Back in the day it was mostly white women and black men but now black women are stepping out of their comfort zone from the darkness into the light.

We've (society) come to accept seeing black men with white women, it’s the norm right?  It has been said that when a black male becomes successful then the white women make themselves available to ride on the gravy train (no pun intended). When you see a black woman and a white man walking together, holding hands its weird. Well it’s weird to me. Not meaning I do not agree, but that a white man is actually in public with a black woman.  Usually the black woman is the white mans best kept secret.

I personally never cared much for interracial dating because the opportunity never presented itself until a few years ago.  Believe me, I was shocked when I was first approached and shocked because for a moment I almost forgot I was married. This man was beautiful. Of course, I did what a married woman would do, by politely declining his number and letting him know that I was happily married. But for a moment, I missed being single.  Now that I rock an afro I get offers all the time so the shock has worn off. I do not know what it is, but its something about about this soul sistah look that white men love.

Think about it people, with the percentage of unwed black women can you blame a woman for saying, "the hell with this, let me see what else is out there"? A sister has to keep her options open. Love is color blind. We all bleed the same blood. When the lights go out, it could be anybody. Besides have you seen the men of the Caucasian persuasion lately...SUPER FINE. Not like when I was young, pale, skinny a lanky. They are athletically built, fitting them jeans in all the right places. Whoa, the arms.......! Lets all have a moment of silence for the almighty arms!

Disclaimer #2: Below are some 'Common Myths' of why white men are dating black woman.  I borrowed them from a website however I forgot to document the site, so just know the bold headings are not mine just the opinion following the myth.

“He just wants some jungle booty.”

Sadly..this is the story I was told.

All men love a big booty and smile.

Let's be real, more and more black woman are settling down with white men, starting a family and having kids. Don’t you find it insulting that it could be all about her booty?  Booticious is a bit over rated so let’s squash this myth. We as black woman have more going for ourselves than an apple bottom. Let’s move on!

“She just wants good-haired babies.”

I have personally heard some of my sister girls say this very same thing.  There is something about having a kid with good hair that is attractive.  We all have a type; good hair being one of them is a bit superficial but I understand. Yet I believe this on some level. We as black woman are rated on the texture, and style of our hair. We have even gone so far as to buy hair that was grown and cut from another woman’s head just so we can have a European texture. This may seem a bit far fetch,  but the truth on some level. I will table this one for later.

 “It will never last.”

Love has no color nor does it have boundaries. Some relationships even couples where race is not an issue do not last so how is this plausible? It doesn’t take much to end a relationship, a little distrust, verbal abuse, a slap here and there and ya momma jokes will end a relationship every time.   If you’re not in it to win it then yeah it won’t last but that can happen to anyone not just interracial couples. This one is stupid.

“She hates herself.  She just doesn’t want to be black.”

In some cases this is true. It is hard being black in America, we are not given the same 'hall pass' as other races. We have to work hard, prove ourselves to close gaps the equality gap. The black man struggle. Or...

Even amongst black Americans we make a big deal about the different shades of black. Being light skinned is better than being dark skinned. Blah blah this goes way back when some slaves were allowed to live in the house while others were made to tend the fields. I do not doubt this myth in words but in deed it’s something different. How can dating outside your race change your color? You born black you will die black, nothing will change that not even marrying a white man. Another far fetched myth in my opinion. If this is in fact the case, then medication is needed not a white man.

“The white man is crazy.  No sane white dude would marry a black woman.”

What ……a white man is better than me?

Lets take it back in history one more gain (pronounced gan). White men have always loved the black women. This is evident with the mixed children (malotto) during slavery times. The only reason the relationships were hidden was because it was against the law, against white society standards, and blacks were considered property, unworthy of a white personal relationship. Besides any man would be CRAZY not to want a beautiful black queen!!

A white man marrying black women is more common now than ever. Move around myth!

“White men are only interested in light-skinned black women.”

Could be, could be NOT! I personally have seen white men with dark women with an afro wearing a dashiki, so this is absolutely not true. Once again everyone has at type and this may very well be one man’s type, and there is nothing wrong with that? For me personally, the blacker the better. Laughing out loud.

P.S. My thoughts, my opinions, my copyright~
 
The End

I asked several  Black Woman their thoughts on interracial dating…AND THE SURVEY SAYS:

(All names have been changed to protect the opinions of th possiblee ignorant..joking)

London: I say go for it. Everyday I see first hand the lack of choices when it comes to finding a good black man.. They are either gay, players or criminals. And because of the limited amount of black men I see our black woman settling for whatever they can get and making excuses for these sorry men. Our men are no longer strong and in my opinion they are cowards. I’m just saying.

BUT I have a pet peeve with our Black men dating white woman, especially our successful black men. They grow up poor seeing their mother, sisters and grandmother struggle then they marry a white woman taking their money outside our community. Look at Kobe Bryant, he married that girl now she divorcing him, her mother lives in one of his 3 mansions, plus she is getting half. Pa-leese…!

I also think these white men have motives, they want a black woman for something different because its exotic and taboo. I guess it can turn into something permanent.

Me: What do you think about black woman choosing white men so their kids can have good hair? 
London: I heard this a long time ago and its being said now also. I do not think it’s a true that someone could be so superficial. Good hair is a perk though, but good hair does not guarantee a cute baby. Your child walking around with good hair yet he/she is dumpy and ugly. You have to look at the whole package with whoever you decide to date. Its just ignorant if someone dates a white ma so their child will have good hair. Just stupid.

Jazmine: No opinion one way or another, do what makes you happy.
 
Tangy: I think white men only look at black woman as sex objects. They don’t take us serious.
 
Joshlyn: Girl I am down with any biracial relationship. To me its whatever rocks your boat, baby go for it. But personally I am not attracted to white men..lol I like mine dark…lol
 
Catina: I don’t have a problem with it but keep him in check because as soon as he say the ‘N’ word, he will be in the hot seat. I’m just saying
 
Stasia: Girl, my kids date outside of their race…I’m use to it these day. We live in that era now. Personally I am not really attracted to white me, but that is just me.
 
TeyTey: Ehh… I could careless. At this point, I think if you are lucky to find love regardless of who it is with and what color/sex they are, then so be it. Hell, in a minute I’m going to finds (yes finds) me a snowflake! Hell I just say, sometimes we wait on brother's to get their Ish together and before we know it, we could be waiting for nothing. I think Black men have more of a problem with black women moving over to white men...but I always say 'then give me a reason NOT too'. do I think white men are better, No. A man is a man first. Color comes second. All of my friends who have dated white men have never said too many bad things about them. I've heard consistently how well they are treated by them, and how white men aren't as insecure as black men are.etc, etc, etc. So, I guess u just never truly know until u roll over on that side of the fence. I went out with one once... nice guy....but had crazy eyes. And I dont do crazy funny shaped eyes... LOL. Call me foolish, but hell, his eyes looked like they just didnt' belong on him. LOL. Chile booooo.
 
Isaac: Black men can date white women but black women can not date white men! Point Blank!

 Woody: I DON'T AGREE WIT MY SISTAS DATIN WHITE MEN...BECUZ WHEN WE AZ BROTHAS SEE OUR SISTAS DATIN WHITE MEN THEN WE BROTHAS WANT 2 DATE WHITE WOMEN AN AT DA END OF DA DAY OUR CULTURE AN OUR PEOPLE R BECOMIN A LOST CAUSE...MY THANG IZ IF A SISTA CAN'T LUV A BLAC MAN THEN SHE IZ FOOLIN HER SELF...AN NOTHIN GUD EVER COMES FROM THAT...

 Abby: Lol...I dated a whit guy ONCE!! One date, one time...It felt weird...Not b/c we were two different races, but b/c he looked at me like I was an exotic piece of meat to experiment with...Uh Uh Mr...Plus, as cute as he was, his breath was on STOP IT mode...I don't have a problem with it, if it works for u, cool...It wasn't the most comfy dating experience for me...I like Black penis thank u... :))

Kay: the same way i feel about our black men dating white women if thats what they want to do so be it love has no color shape or size thats how i feel honestly

Henry: There is nothing wrong with it. The only reason people have an issue with it because someone has planted a seed in their head.

Sasha: I have already crossed over into the white chocolate last year.  They are different but they love the same.  Its just hard to see a 'pink' one when your use to a 'brown' one.

Kelli: I do not have a problem with it as long as he treats her right.


 Last words ..I say go for it...a man is a man. Love and happiness has no boundaries!